I just have to share my latest adventure with you. Not sure why because really it was slightly embarrassing but hey I can laugh at myself. This past weekend was my youngest sons birthday. Cooper turned 4. He is an amazing little guy. Born 8 weeks early and fought for 40 days in the nicu and was completely healed by Jesus! We actually celebrated his birthday twice. Saturday afternoon we had a small party and then yesterday we went to Philly where we celebrated with his cousin who turned 3. We took all the kids to this indoor park called Arnolds. It was like a huge arcade. Go carts, laser tag, video games, carasols, trains, froggers and big bouncey things. It was a massive wharehouse for kids of all ages. So we let the kids go nuts and bounce and race and do all the crazy fun rides. They had a blast!
After all the fun my husband and sister-in -law thought it would be a great idea to race on some high tech very fast go-carts. I was like umm yea ok -no thanks. But they didnt seem to listen to me - I just got the look from my love ... you know the look don't you? The look was like the look of your doing it and your going to like it and I'm going to beat you and this will be really fun "look".
So we waited in line FOR-EVER and all the other kids actually got to ride before us on the slower carts. Then it was our turn. I just realized today that I actually never drove one of these before. I've driven some slow ones but not these in an actual race on an actual track that was CRAZY. My husband was laughing at me because 1st of all I don't think I was actually tall enough to drive but I don't think they are very strict w/ there rules. So they gave me a booster seat. Yep a booster seat. That should have been the 1st sign to just turn around and leave. But no I stuck w/ it.
The race began and my husband was in front of me and my sister-in-law was behind me and 4 other drivers. I could hear my sister yelling "step on the gas" - I was. These go-carts are battery powered so they all must have different speeds. She flew past me and was triing to beat her brother. His cart was way too fast. I was just triing to figure how to drive this thing. It did not turn very well and everyone was passing me. Obviously you cant take the corners like you do in Mario Kart. I tried sliding around a corner- well that left me in a complete 180 facing the wrong direction. When I realized what I did I started screaming because here came all the other drivers. They must have all the drivers on video becasue out of no where came some guys running to turn me around. I somehow got stuck on the wall. So off I went again. That probably was my 2nd mistake. I kept going except a tad slower. As I rounded the next lap I made my 3rd mistake and looked over at all my adoring fans ( my kids were cheering me on) and as I took the next sharp turn I didn't see someone was behind me and sorta jerked my wheel and someone was triing to pass me and collided with me and smashed me into the wall. I was completely stunned. Then when I saw who smashed me I was not very happy. Who do you think it was? It was my husband. And did he stop to make sure I was ok? Nope! I was completely in tears and pain. That did not feel very good. This was suppose to be fun and not dangerous. Apparently I missed the sign "Drive at your own risk". So out popped one of the track hands. He looked down at my face and my tears and said " are you done"? all pitiful like. I thought about it. I was sitting there and I was like No! I am not quitting! Something just sorta rose up inside of me. I AM NOT QUITTING. I HAVE NOT COME THIS FAR TO QUIT!
I did finish the race. I was burning up! I am not a quitter and I don't like to thrown out of the race. Can you relate? I felt like this was a paralle moment in my life. I felt this righteous anger well up in me and it pushed me forward. I know as I continued in the race I could have quit at anytime. I could have just jetted out the exit. No one would have blamed me. Actually everyone probably would have said "thank God".
I probably should have servere whiplash. I hit the wall pretty hard. I felt a shock go comletely through my body. Last night as I went to bed very sore I asked my hubby to forgive me - I'm not going to lie to you - I was upset with him and I had to repent for my attitude. Then I asked him to pray for me. I felt actually better in the morning- well at least body wise.
Before I went to sleep last night I was laying on my bed just talking to God and of course one of my comments was..."Lord please don't ever let me think that go-carts would ever be a great idea again" but as I sat there thinking of why was I so mad at my husband after it happened. Then I remembered what Pastor Dave said in his message the day before. Quote: People that are angy are that way because they are scared.
Now I am not an angry person at all but whenever the kids or my husband get rough like when they are playing around and I get hurt- I get upset. It was one of those learning moments- you know one of those moments that Papa shows you and then teaches you through it. Yep that was totally that.
I don't want any obstacle that will hold me back from knowing more of Jesus. I don't want anything to hold up or get in the way of my intimacy with him.
Holy Spirit come , check me, remove any root or seed that is not from you and that will hinder our relationship. Amen.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Momentum.... its beginning.
Well this is week 5 of Preschool and probably the best week so far. Momentum. Says it. Saturday nights and Sunday mornings are so completely different. Like night and day and thats probably why. This past week I heard the Lord say "Jump in the river". Its beginning. I am telling you. The children are beginning to see pictures. Today a young gal (well they are all young) had a picture of a gift and it was purple well of course it was - when I asked her what color it was I knew she was going to say purple - why? its the color of royalty and Jesus was giving out gifts. Ha Ha is that not exciting. Ok so it does get better. During our lesson I was praying over the children for there ears to be open so they could hear Jesus and after I finished with the last little fellow ( I know I know they are all little ) one of the other little guys came stumbling over to me and he was like " I'm all dizzy" Ha Ha! So I was like " hey the Holy Spirit is here and is all over you- lay down" Then I had like 4 kids laying on the floor face down. Ha Ha I so kid you not. Then it was over. Oh boy its going to get good. I'm so excited I just can't hide it.....
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Preschool - wild and wooly
So this is week 4 for me in my new ministry "the Preschool". It has been an up and down wild and wooly rollercoaster these past weeks. Thank you Lord for all your encouragement you have sent and all of your grace on me. Can I just tell you that the kids truly are amazing! We don't give them enough credit. They are soooo sensitve to the spirit.
Today in worship all the kids were jumping up and down to the music. Compared to the first week - they all just stood there and looked at me and wondered what planet I just flew in from. And when I ask them if Jesus showed them anything they are all starting to say "hey I saw this or that". There is just a sweet peace beginning to fill the rooms and the hallways. I feel like every week a new wall is being brought down. You can just sence it. This was our 4th week of walking around our Jericho. Instead of it getting easier it is actually getting harder. The great thing of working with this age- the kids emotions are written all over their face. As we march around - we are warring a spirtual battle and the children are like a reflection of what is going on in the spiritual realm. Today as we marched it was like marching through mud. It was dreadful. We were like pulling them (not literally). They marched slow and it was very somber. The first child had this look on his face that was like one who looked like he was dreading it and ready to step in poop. Its very interesting (well to me I guess). We have 3 more weeks of marching and the last week we are going to celebrate with shofars and worship.
I feel like everyday God is showing me something about the preschool and giving me ideas. So as he downloads to me I am triing to obey.
Today in worship all the kids were jumping up and down to the music. Compared to the first week - they all just stood there and looked at me and wondered what planet I just flew in from. And when I ask them if Jesus showed them anything they are all starting to say "hey I saw this or that". There is just a sweet peace beginning to fill the rooms and the hallways. I feel like every week a new wall is being brought down. You can just sence it. This was our 4th week of walking around our Jericho. Instead of it getting easier it is actually getting harder. The great thing of working with this age- the kids emotions are written all over their face. As we march around - we are warring a spirtual battle and the children are like a reflection of what is going on in the spiritual realm. Today as we marched it was like marching through mud. It was dreadful. We were like pulling them (not literally). They marched slow and it was very somber. The first child had this look on his face that was like one who looked like he was dreading it and ready to step in poop. Its very interesting (well to me I guess). We have 3 more weeks of marching and the last week we are going to celebrate with shofars and worship.
I feel like everyday God is showing me something about the preschool and giving me ideas. So as he downloads to me I am triing to obey.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
A New Adventure
2010 has and will bring many changes to our household. It has been an exciting journey into the new year. As we closed out 2009 we were in better shape financially then we had been in probably 2 years. Yea God! We seeded fianacially for provision to break forth and it did! We have had several snow storms also that brought work for my husband and has increased the cash flow. Yea God!
As of January 1st I started in a new position- a ministry actually. I was asked to become the Director of Preschool at my church. I am so excited about this opportunity to minister to the young children. God has been downloading so much to me in the past month about where he wants to take this age group. I have had many prophetic dreams about this in the past several years- not realizing it was pointing at this until now and also several dreams after I accepted the position.
I would like to share one of the dreams I had just recently. I was at a conference of some sort and there were people of great leadership there. ( I am only 4"11 so I am short but in this dream I was also very short and everyone else towered over me) As we gathered at this convention there was some sort of disturbance and we had to have a venue change immediatley. So everyone scattered to their cars. As I looked at everyones cars lined up they were all convertible luxury sportcars and everyone getting into the cars were acting like they were authority. They had weapons attached to there hips. It was very alarming. Here I was standing at my super hardtop big wheeled red jeep. Sorta feeling out of place. Just then a very friendly and handsome man was standing beside me smiling into my eyes and said - "I want to ride with you." "ummm well ok... I guess - I don't have a fancy converible or anything." So as we left and drove down the road the Director of the Childrens Ministry and the Assistant Director were riding in my jeep. As we were driving down the road I noticed it was a dirt road and I went to make a right hand turn but it wasn't a road it was a rest stop and I pulled out again and Bethany said" Kelly why not stop there and you can go swimming." Then I continued to drive looking for the right turn.
The impression of this dream to me was: At one point people were armed with authority to take their minstry in a certain direction/place but God is changing the direction and place and he is equipping me to go down roads less traveled and I might not have a fancy vehicle but He is equipping me with a vehicle that is built for durability and roughness and to go where we haven't gone before or very often. The guy -I believe was an angel.
To me this dream was confirming my calling right now. This is my 3rd weekend running the preschool and it has been totally exciting. I feel there are many walls that need to come down and God is tearing them down every week. He has really laid on my heart to teach the children to worship prophetically. So we are doing dance and soaking worship - currently. The kids are starting to get it. I have been able to pray with children weekly. Last week God healed a little guys chin that was hurting. Yea God! Each week I can see the handprint of our Father emerging on the children and this past week I kept hearing wildfire. There is a stirring that has started! I can't believe I have a front row seat! Whoo hoo! I would like to post more but for now I hope this gets your senses tingling!
As of January 1st I started in a new position- a ministry actually. I was asked to become the Director of Preschool at my church. I am so excited about this opportunity to minister to the young children. God has been downloading so much to me in the past month about where he wants to take this age group. I have had many prophetic dreams about this in the past several years- not realizing it was pointing at this until now and also several dreams after I accepted the position.
I would like to share one of the dreams I had just recently. I was at a conference of some sort and there were people of great leadership there. ( I am only 4"11 so I am short but in this dream I was also very short and everyone else towered over me) As we gathered at this convention there was some sort of disturbance and we had to have a venue change immediatley. So everyone scattered to their cars. As I looked at everyones cars lined up they were all convertible luxury sportcars and everyone getting into the cars were acting like they were authority. They had weapons attached to there hips. It was very alarming. Here I was standing at my super hardtop big wheeled red jeep. Sorta feeling out of place. Just then a very friendly and handsome man was standing beside me smiling into my eyes and said - "I want to ride with you." "ummm well ok... I guess - I don't have a fancy converible or anything." So as we left and drove down the road the Director of the Childrens Ministry and the Assistant Director were riding in my jeep. As we were driving down the road I noticed it was a dirt road and I went to make a right hand turn but it wasn't a road it was a rest stop and I pulled out again and Bethany said" Kelly why not stop there and you can go swimming." Then I continued to drive looking for the right turn.
The impression of this dream to me was: At one point people were armed with authority to take their minstry in a certain direction/place but God is changing the direction and place and he is equipping me to go down roads less traveled and I might not have a fancy vehicle but He is equipping me with a vehicle that is built for durability and roughness and to go where we haven't gone before or very often. The guy -I believe was an angel.
To me this dream was confirming my calling right now. This is my 3rd weekend running the preschool and it has been totally exciting. I feel there are many walls that need to come down and God is tearing them down every week. He has really laid on my heart to teach the children to worship prophetically. So we are doing dance and soaking worship - currently. The kids are starting to get it. I have been able to pray with children weekly. Last week God healed a little guys chin that was hurting. Yea God! Each week I can see the handprint of our Father emerging on the children and this past week I kept hearing wildfire. There is a stirring that has started! I can't believe I have a front row seat! Whoo hoo! I would like to post more but for now I hope this gets your senses tingling!
Sunday, December 20, 2009
May you have a might encounter with Christ!
This morning at church we were partaking in communion and my father said "Kelly why don't you pray since you have so much to be thankful for this week." Ya know it just doesn't take much to wreck me. I managed to choke out "thankyou father for loving us and blessing us" and I was done and my mom was bawling. Last week it was provision and then this snow storm - amazing! If God can birth a nation in a day why can't he rescue us in a day?
I was just sitting here reflecting on this past week and it seems like a dream. How can you one day be wondering how you are going to feed your family and pay your bills to wondering wait what the heck just happened to us? Ha Ha! Only our Father in heaven. I can't even tell you how many tears I have cried and how many prayers I have said. Its like childbirth. 9 months of carring around a expentancy and then the time comes and its so intense and then its done. And as you lay there holding this precious life in your hands wondering wait - its over. But the reminder of what you went through is all to vivid.
Already this Christmas season is different. I feel different. The other day my brother and I were Christmas shopping for the 1st time this season. I coudn't buy anything. I just stood there with tears in my eyes. My brother Sean just looked at me and finally said " Kelly - you got to make up your mind today- this stuff will all be gone" and I was like" I can't" - its like the story that Heidi Baker told of her first time going to a buffet and freezing up. She is a missionary in a starving nation. Well thats how I felt- sick to my stomach. Thinking we have gone with out for so long and now I have to buy gifts and I just.... well I was overwelmed. Sean grabbed my shoulder and said "God has blessed you with this money so you can bless your children". Yea. Ok. I got it. Sort of.
So as I am sitting here reflecting- I want this Christmas to be different. My heart is screaming out "Father draw me into you! Bring my family to greater intimacy with you. Take us higher. Take us deeper." I have amazing memories of Christmas and all the wonderful things our parents do to make it special. I want Papa to allow amazing mighty encounters with him this Christmas- thats what I want. I want to share this with you! I am so thankful that we were able to buy gifts for our kids. I really am. This year is going to be different and I think its going to be a beginning of a new way of celebrating this season.
Thank you father that you love us. You are amazing. Thankyou Lord for all you have done. And for all you are going to do.
It says in the bible that God has treasure stored in heaven for those that love him. I love him. I have fallen in love. Even during this time of intense testing. I still love him... well actually more. I have laid daily my worries and fears at his feet. I heard this comment from Fanz Lippi- "Prayers are effective. They are like taking a sledge hammer against a wide block cement wall. Eventually you are going to break through." ( well it was something like that)
Merry Christmas friends! May you have a mighty encounter with Christ!
I was just sitting here reflecting on this past week and it seems like a dream. How can you one day be wondering how you are going to feed your family and pay your bills to wondering wait what the heck just happened to us? Ha Ha! Only our Father in heaven. I can't even tell you how many tears I have cried and how many prayers I have said. Its like childbirth. 9 months of carring around a expentancy and then the time comes and its so intense and then its done. And as you lay there holding this precious life in your hands wondering wait - its over. But the reminder of what you went through is all to vivid.
Already this Christmas season is different. I feel different. The other day my brother and I were Christmas shopping for the 1st time this season. I coudn't buy anything. I just stood there with tears in my eyes. My brother Sean just looked at me and finally said " Kelly - you got to make up your mind today- this stuff will all be gone" and I was like" I can't" - its like the story that Heidi Baker told of her first time going to a buffet and freezing up. She is a missionary in a starving nation. Well thats how I felt- sick to my stomach. Thinking we have gone with out for so long and now I have to buy gifts and I just.... well I was overwelmed. Sean grabbed my shoulder and said "God has blessed you with this money so you can bless your children". Yea. Ok. I got it. Sort of.
So as I am sitting here reflecting- I want this Christmas to be different. My heart is screaming out "Father draw me into you! Bring my family to greater intimacy with you. Take us higher. Take us deeper." I have amazing memories of Christmas and all the wonderful things our parents do to make it special. I want Papa to allow amazing mighty encounters with him this Christmas- thats what I want. I want to share this with you! I am so thankful that we were able to buy gifts for our kids. I really am. This year is going to be different and I think its going to be a beginning of a new way of celebrating this season.
Thank you father that you love us. You are amazing. Thankyou Lord for all you have done. And for all you are going to do.
It says in the bible that God has treasure stored in heaven for those that love him. I love him. I have fallen in love. Even during this time of intense testing. I still love him... well actually more. I have laid daily my worries and fears at his feet. I heard this comment from Fanz Lippi- "Prayers are effective. They are like taking a sledge hammer against a wide block cement wall. Eventually you are going to break through." ( well it was something like that)
Merry Christmas friends! May you have a mighty encounter with Christ!
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Promises of provision being fullfilled
I have to do a update to my previous post because that was really depressing wasn't it? I read other peoples blogs and they are not so heavy as mine but I really feel lead to write and be honest about where we are at, for me its like an online journal... hmmmm just for all the world to see!
So last week was probably our bottom. Everything and anything went not the way we were hoping. I was devastated and spent most of the weekend criing. My heart literally feels like it is just shattering. My hubby and I were starting to play the blame game. You know what I mean don't you? At that point we sat down and prayed. That is really hard when your in the middle of the blame game. It stopped it.
This past weekend Pastor Dave made a remark in his sermon and I heard it but I didn't. After the service we were talking to my parents and my Dad said "did you hear what P. Dave said?" and I was like "ummmmm which part?" and Dad said " when you are in a place that you can't help yourself you are right where God wants you to be". Well, we are there! Ha!
This past Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday - 3 separate provision miracles happend to us. Big ones - well to me when nothing has happened and your on the bottom then everything is amazing. All I can say is I was triing to have hope that we would have a Christmas but I was also prepared that we would not and Sunday night as I was talking w/ Papa - I said to him "you told me to have reckless hopefullness but I have nothing left in me to hope".
Now I am going crazy triing to shop and plan for Christmas. HaHa! God is so good!
God is faithfull in fullfilling his promises! This has not been an easy or short journey. It has been hard remembering that and confessing that when everything is not going my way. He loves us soooo much! So much that he is stripping away my pride and showing me how to have complete trust in him.
I know your wondering what the provision miracles were. Ha! I am going to say this- that if God didn't strip the pride off of us - he would not have been able to give us this provision. Do you get that? Because that was just like a aha moment - wow. Ummm yea. If you really want to know I will share with you but not on here. Its just not the place or maybe the time. I feel like when God gets into the grit and creates a miracle I want to share it and I think we should but I'm not ready to yet. I am letting it all sink in.
I feel like there is more provision coming and I am excited! Are we out of this yet? ..... I don't know and I am not focusing on that right now. I want to enjoy this Christmas with my family and enjoy knowing that God is sooooo good!
So last week was probably our bottom. Everything and anything went not the way we were hoping. I was devastated and spent most of the weekend criing. My heart literally feels like it is just shattering. My hubby and I were starting to play the blame game. You know what I mean don't you? At that point we sat down and prayed. That is really hard when your in the middle of the blame game. It stopped it.
This past weekend Pastor Dave made a remark in his sermon and I heard it but I didn't. After the service we were talking to my parents and my Dad said "did you hear what P. Dave said?" and I was like "ummmmm which part?" and Dad said " when you are in a place that you can't help yourself you are right where God wants you to be". Well, we are there! Ha!
This past Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday - 3 separate provision miracles happend to us. Big ones - well to me when nothing has happened and your on the bottom then everything is amazing. All I can say is I was triing to have hope that we would have a Christmas but I was also prepared that we would not and Sunday night as I was talking w/ Papa - I said to him "you told me to have reckless hopefullness but I have nothing left in me to hope".
Now I am going crazy triing to shop and plan for Christmas. HaHa! God is so good!
God is faithfull in fullfilling his promises! This has not been an easy or short journey. It has been hard remembering that and confessing that when everything is not going my way. He loves us soooo much! So much that he is stripping away my pride and showing me how to have complete trust in him.
I know your wondering what the provision miracles were. Ha! I am going to say this- that if God didn't strip the pride off of us - he would not have been able to give us this provision. Do you get that? Because that was just like a aha moment - wow. Ummm yea. If you really want to know I will share with you but not on here. Its just not the place or maybe the time. I feel like when God gets into the grit and creates a miracle I want to share it and I think we should but I'm not ready to yet. I am letting it all sink in.
I feel like there is more provision coming and I am excited! Are we out of this yet? ..... I don't know and I am not focusing on that right now. I want to enjoy this Christmas with my family and enjoy knowing that God is sooooo good!
Friday, December 11, 2009
broken...
Greetings friends! This is my 3rd start to this blog( i keep deleting and starting over!). Can I share my experience with you today? A humbling one? Well good because I am.
Today we went to the new doctors for the kids. So yea that was really interesting. I'm not sure how I survived it without turning around and leaving...in the parking lot before I even parked. Yes thats not a good sign is it? Can I tell you that I am being humbled beyond my imagination. In a previous blog I mentioned that we got kicked off our blue chip and were so graciouly put on medicade. It was a 2 month battle that I did not win and we were stuck with the doctor that was pre-chosen for us. No one else excepted this insurance so we being directed to a inner city health center.
All I can say is God must be giving me courage that I didn't know that I had. As I drove thru a part of the city that is not a place that I would typically drive slowly or find a parking spot. So I find the center that is placed right beside a church and in front of probably a crack house. So we went into the building that had a pharmacy located in it. Does your doctors office have that? Hmmmmmm. Yea thats pretty interesting. We walked thru the building and found the pediatrics. As I sat there my eyes are just brimming... thinking Lord what are you doing to us? We felt very out of place- please I am saying that very humbling but honestly. Look the truth is I could have just walked out of there. I almost did but I coudn't - the kids needed there shots. I could give you all the disparing details of the rooms, the help, the people. My son kept saying to me "Mom I don't like this place." As we left I asked him "Ok so what did you think of that place?" and I expected him to remark about the people but he just said " the room was to small and not very nice but the doctor was really nice- I liked her." Hmmm wow- thats pretty cool. I have a pretty level headed kid. "Yea, the doctor was really great" I said "and you know we are no better then any of these people that are there. You know that right?" I finished. " Yea I know" My son said. "God loves these people the same as us, we really are no different". I added.
After we got home I was folding clothes and rehashing my afternoon. Wondering why us. What Lord are you taking us thru and for what reason. Even now as I am writing this part of me is thinking I can't believe you would even subject yourself to that -your better then that. Really?
This has been the most challenging month for us. I thought gee this can't get any worse and it has. I will spare you all the details but I will say this we arent the same. We are not stuck up. We are not selfish. We are no better then anyone else. We are broken. We are at the mercy of our Lord. If we didn't believe in him we would have never made it this far. We are changed. We are preciously place in Papas hands. And only now are we beginning to live. Anything and everything could not be in our favor right now its simply not.
Our eyes are being opened. Our hearts are to the point that there is no resistance. Could this be where the Lord is readying us?
Today we went to the new doctors for the kids. So yea that was really interesting. I'm not sure how I survived it without turning around and leaving...in the parking lot before I even parked. Yes thats not a good sign is it? Can I tell you that I am being humbled beyond my imagination. In a previous blog I mentioned that we got kicked off our blue chip and were so graciouly put on medicade. It was a 2 month battle that I did not win and we were stuck with the doctor that was pre-chosen for us. No one else excepted this insurance so we being directed to a inner city health center.
All I can say is God must be giving me courage that I didn't know that I had. As I drove thru a part of the city that is not a place that I would typically drive slowly or find a parking spot. So I find the center that is placed right beside a church and in front of probably a crack house. So we went into the building that had a pharmacy located in it. Does your doctors office have that? Hmmmmmm. Yea thats pretty interesting. We walked thru the building and found the pediatrics. As I sat there my eyes are just brimming... thinking Lord what are you doing to us? We felt very out of place- please I am saying that very humbling but honestly. Look the truth is I could have just walked out of there. I almost did but I coudn't - the kids needed there shots. I could give you all the disparing details of the rooms, the help, the people. My son kept saying to me "Mom I don't like this place." As we left I asked him "Ok so what did you think of that place?" and I expected him to remark about the people but he just said " the room was to small and not very nice but the doctor was really nice- I liked her." Hmmm wow- thats pretty cool. I have a pretty level headed kid. "Yea, the doctor was really great" I said "and you know we are no better then any of these people that are there. You know that right?" I finished. " Yea I know" My son said. "God loves these people the same as us, we really are no different". I added.
After we got home I was folding clothes and rehashing my afternoon. Wondering why us. What Lord are you taking us thru and for what reason. Even now as I am writing this part of me is thinking I can't believe you would even subject yourself to that -your better then that. Really?
This has been the most challenging month for us. I thought gee this can't get any worse and it has. I will spare you all the details but I will say this we arent the same. We are not stuck up. We are not selfish. We are no better then anyone else. We are broken. We are at the mercy of our Lord. If we didn't believe in him we would have never made it this far. We are changed. We are preciously place in Papas hands. And only now are we beginning to live. Anything and everything could not be in our favor right now its simply not.
Our eyes are being opened. Our hearts are to the point that there is no resistance. Could this be where the Lord is readying us?
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